Wedding after wedding after wedding

By now, you've probably heard that a former President's daughter is getting married this weekend. It's happing just on the other side of the Hudson River from the Catskills, so the story is getting played to death in the local media. (Spare a thought for the other couples in the area who decided a long time ago to schedule their wedding for tomorrow.) I'm about as sick and tired of the coverage as I would be for any celebrity wedding, and can't help but think about some of the great Hollywood weddings.

Apparently, there's going to be a no-fly zone over the wedding. I guess that means the groom can't fly in on an autogyro. On the bright side, it also implies that the bride won't ruin the wedding by running off with a reporter, who will need a toy trumpet to break down the walls of Jericho.

Is Bill or Hillary more likely to play the part of Julie Harris in Member of the Wedding?

I hope there's no giant plate glass window for for one of Chelsea's old boyfriends to call out to her before running off with her. Of course, that would have required the guy to have slept with Hillary.

At least the weather calls for no rain, so Bill won't get rained on if Chelsea hides in the bathroom

Perhaps Chelsea and Marc will turn out to be twins, and several years later meet up with the world's wealthiest bachelor and his serially-divorced sister.

And they all lived happily ever after.... Or did they?